Use of the terms "boy" and "boyfriend"

[Gaybutton]

For those upset calling them boys, maybe the first order of business should be to get the bar owners together, explain how politically incorrect the word is, and get them to change the sign that says "Boystown" to "Young Gentlemen's Town" . . .

[fountainhall]

For those upset calling them boys, maybe the first order of business should be to get the bar owners together, explain how politically incorrect the word is, and get them to change the sign that says "Boystown" to "Young Gentlemen's Town" . . .

I have written that I see absolutely no problem with the use of the word "boy" in reference to those working in the bars. But if you have a lover/partner with whom you have spent several months, would you be happy to call him "boy or "my boy" in his presence when chatting with friends? I just couldn't do that.

[Gaybutton]

if you have a lover/partner with whom you have spent several months, would you be happy to call him "boy or "my boy" in his presence when chatting with friends?.

I wouldn't call him "boy" or "my boy" when chatting with friends even if he wasn't present. I wouldn't feel comfortable with that. It wouldn't be because I find anything about it derogatory. It would simply be because, in my opinion, it just doesn't work. I'd come up with something else. That's my choice.

Meanwhile, I would have no problem if someone else prefers to use those terms. That would be his choice.

[RichLB]

Another aspect to be considered is what the use of any term like "boy" says about the user. Whether or not someone feels demeaned by the word, usage does reveal a lot about the mindset of the speaker. If someone calls me a faggot I don't feel "less than", but I do recognize the other person as either ignorant or worse. Our choice of language reflects the workings of our minds.

[Dodger]

Most farang refer to Thai boys as "boys" because it is commonly used by the Thais themselves and perfectly acceptable in Thai culture. If someone is uncomfortable with the term, they can always use an alternative term. Nobody really cares.

You are wrong, Dodger, my boyfriend does not want to be referred to as a "boy".. People do care.

No, your boyfriend would probably prefer being called "your boyfriend".

Am I missing something here?

[gera]

If the couple are married, or consider themselves to be married [regardless of what the law might allow or whether or not they are actually married], wouldn't the terms "husband" or "spouse" be more appropriate?

Would not be the term husband sexist? And wife more politically correct? I consider this discussion as totally absurd. English is not my first language.
But in my native language using the term girl or even my girl for female partner of any age is not only not offensive but frequently indicative of adoration. Use the term boyfriend for a male partner of any age in America where I live for many years is omnipresent and not offensive at all.

[fountainhall]

Personally, I actively dislike the use of husband and wife in any gay relationship or marriage. But then I have one good friend who frequently calls his much younger partner his wife. I decided just not to comment after they got married!

[Gaybutton]

I have one good friend who frequently calls his much younger partner his wife. I decided just not to comment after they got married!

Imagine if he was saying "lady boy."

My opinion, whatever anyone feels comfortable with is fine unless the object of the reference doesn't like it.

I think far too much is being made about the political correctness, or incorrectness, of these terms. To me it's very simple. If using the term "boy", "boyfriend", or any of these other terms bothers anyone, then use different terms, even though there is no essential difference in meaning. But don't try to persuade others that now they too have to do the same thing.

Here are some language changes that some might find an improvement. You know - so nobody will have to feel offended or feel they are using offensive language:

Indiana - change to Native Americaniana
Indianapolis - change to Native Americanapolis
Cleveland Indians - change to Cleveland Native Americans
Washington Redskins - change to Washington Native Americans
Kansas City Chiefs - change to Kansas City Native Americans
Gay Pride - change to Same Sex Preference Pride
Mandrake the Magician - change to Persondrake the Magician
Manischewitz Wine - change to Personshewitz Wine
Boy oh Boy! - change to Gentleman oh Gentleman!
Squaw Valley - change to Female Native American Valley
Indiana Jones - change to Native Americaniana Jones
Arabic Numerals - change to Middle Eastern Numerals

I wonder if approval for those can be had from David Letterperson . . .

[RichLB]

Ah, GB.... Language changes as does the connotations attached to various words. As an ancient graduate of Stanford University I bemoaned the demise of our moniker Stanford Indians. We are now known as simply a color - Stanford Cardinal. We also abandoned our beloved mascot, Prince Lightfoot, and exchanged him for that silly bouncing tree. While you report that native Americans in Florida don't object to being called Indians, enough in California apparently did/do.

[Dodger]

The Lone Ranger's trusted sidekick "Tonto" didn't seem to mind the fact that the nickname he was given translates to "Stupid" in Spanish.

All he said after hearing this the first time was..."Yes, Kemosabe".