What do YOU CURRENTLY tip in Pattaya for short time ?

[Jun]

I agree with Dodger on this one. I tend to take the opposite approach - try to get the boy to tell me what he likes and work from there - that's if I'm not getting the vibes I want right from the start.

Well I do things in the correct order.
1 Polite introductions.
2 Attempting to establish if he is a money boy, without asking directly.
3 Asking what he likes doing.
4 Once he has said he likes doing the things I want, I make it clear that getting tipped is contingent on providing certain services from that list.

So I'm merely asking him to do what he promises. Which is still respectful.

Perhaps about 5~20% drop out at step 4, so I can only deduce that they were not willing to do what they initially promised. Exactly the result I'm looking for. It keeps non-performers away, so I never have to follow through on the zero tip threat.

I started doing this around about 2017, after a few Cambodian bar boys made promises that were not kept. I've had far better results since then.

I treat the lads with respect. I expect that to work both ways and both parties should keep promises.

Almost all of them ask for a repeat off & often ask me to come to their bar, even if we met via Grindr.
When they know I'm a butterfly, they sometimes also introduce me to their friends.

[Gaybutton]

I make it clear that getting tipped is contingent on providing certain services from that list.

So I'm merely asking him to do what he promises. Which is still respectful.

Perhaps about 5~20% drop out at step 4

Still respectful? Not to me, it isn't. Have you considered that some drop out because they find the part about tip contingency insulting? I don't see that as respectful. To me your step 4 ought to be an "it goes without saying". I would never tell a boy if you don't do what you promised, no tip. I see that as a threat, not a form of respect. The boys that drop out might see it that way too.

I do agree with your steps 1-3.

[Jun]

Boys usually ask what they're going to get tipped these days.
So it seems only fair that they are asked to keep their promises in return.

Only the most thin skinned should be offended.

Bear in mind, when I started this back in 2017, I was working and had short holidays. So I was very keen to filter out the occasional dud who promised more than he delivered. The type of attitude recently described by another board member.

This probably matters far less for expats who have 365 days a year to try the next boy.

[Gaybutton]

Ok, Jun and I have each said our piece. Anyone else want to chime in on this?

[Dodger]

The working boys have a very broad scope of people they have to deal with, which, in-and-by-itself, presents a lot of challenges.

As mentioned before, they know each punters M.O. including their tipping habits almost immediately after a punter hits the scene. Punters who are return holiday-goers already have their M.O.'s etched in the memories of the boys and mamasans working the scene, and this doesn't just happen by accident, it happens because the collecting and sharing of this information is critical for their success and wellbeing. Thais forget NOTHING.

Having said that, it's no mystery why the boys occasionally question how much a punter is going to tip ahead of time - if in fact that particular punter has a reputation of expecting a lot more than he's willing to pay for and/or he's just a cheap Charlie which is not uncommon in Pattaya. Fortunately (for the working boys) a good percentage of punters are known to tip fairly, if not extremely well.

I know I'm not saying anything that you guys don't already know - but I think it's worth emphasizing that there's a 95% chance that the boy you're interacting with is Buddhist which influences every single thing about his personality, including the fact that he doesn't like being confronted with defined expectations (or rules) for his services, nor does he like being threatened that if he doesn't perform to the punters expectations he won't receive his tip. Most boys would prefer avoiding a punter who projects bad karma like this all-together, but if they're desperate enough for the money they tend to do whatever it takes to survive.

The more generous you are, not only with your money, but with your heart, the better the interaction with that special person that you're sitting next to will be. You never know, you may end up sitting next to that person the rest of your life.

What goes around comes around.

[Gaybutton]

Thais forget NOTHING.

I can vouch for that. I know for a fact that part of your post is absolutely true - absolutely. If one knows, it doesn't take long before they all know, especially if it is something they see as particularly positive or negative.

[Jun]

Irrespective of what's written, people who still off lads on a regular basis should have a good idea of whether or not boys are keen to see them again.

Good signs might include trying to drag you into their bar, waving at you from across the street, messaging you asking when we can meet next or even adjusting their travel plans to meet you again. Plus all the usual body language signals.

[christianpfc]

I also believe that it's more than just the "tip" that influences the level of satisfaction you'll receive during an "off"...and it starts with presenting yourself as being a good person, and in their eyes this would be a person who shows a real interest in knowing them, versus sitting next to them with a list of sexual demands (personal wants). When you do this they immediately know what type of person you are, and good tip or not, Karma is a huge influencer in Thai culture.

In all my time, I have found no correlation between tip or the way I present myself and performance. Based on hundreds of boys from bars and online, Bangkok, Pattaya and provinces, in English and in Thai, paid or free. I don't discuss tip or activities, unless the boy starts (then I just reply), and go with the flow.

I have become much better over time to weed out those who are unreliable or have mental health issues or intellectual deficiencies.

[Dodger]

In all my time, I have found no correlation between tip or the way I present myself and performance.

If you're the type of person who presents himself as a gentleman who tips fairly - the boys will most likely perform good on a consistent basis.

To be honest I was always an exceptionally good tipper back when I was a helicopter pilot and always treated the boys with kindness and respect. In all my years (and literally thousands of offs) I can only remember one bad performer - and that was because we both guzzled too much 100 Pipers at Hollywood Disco and he passed out immediately after peeing in the bed...555. Full credit for the success I've enjoyed over-the-years belongs to my tipping habits and the way I treated them (karma). No doubt about it.

How many times have you heard a farang with a negative personality (*or cheap Charlie) complaining about a boys performance?, e.g., he didn't do what I wanted, he didn't do what he promised, he was in too much of a hurry, he resisted me at every move when trying to kiss him, he was glued to his smartphone the whole time, he couldn't wait to dash out of the room when the deed was done, he refused to spend the night, etc., etc., etc., and the list goes on and on.

Keep being jai dee like I know you are and enjoying yourself to the max. That's what life's all about. And leave the bad experiences to the self-centered ones.

[Gaybutton]

Keep being jai dee like I know you are and enjoying yourself to the max. That's what life's all about. And leave the bad experiences to the self-centered ones.

I absolutely agree. I wish I had said that. I have plenty of experience too. Some people have all kinds of methods they try - and fail - when the real secret to the whole satisfying, enjoyable experience is very simple - just be jai dee. I always try to make sure the boy is enjoying it too and I make it very clear and I always let him know - If there is something I ask you to do, but you don't like to do that, you don't have to do it. I want you to do only what you like. I cannot be happy unless you are happy too.

That approach always works beautifully for me and I don't recall a single exception - not ever. And they are always happy if I ask them to come to me again.

And don't forget the tip. I think it is a mistake to go overboard with generous tips. Give a good, fair amount.