Why are Gay Mongers So Old?

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bi-top
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Why are Gay Mongers So Old?

Post by bi-top »

Caveat: I am old, so I can say that.

Honestly though, a majority of gay travelers/mongers that I see in thailand are typically above 55; and in some cases, 20 years above that. Where are the slightly younger guys?

Look at the straight bars. The average age appears to be at least 20 years younger. And they have and are spending money.

I have asked this question before and get weird answers that don't quench my curiosity.

"Gay travelers have much better choices of where to travel". Really? Where are these "better" places with Pattaya's level of entertainment and available partners?

"Gay guys are more relationship oriented and not looking for many sex partners like the older guys." WHAT????

"Gay travelers don't need to pay for sex". ok.

"Gays aren't traveling right now". Why? The comment doesn't make sense on so many levels.

SO - I put it out here again.

1. Why is GAY PATTAYA dying a slow death? Does anyone want to tell how many bars Sunee alone used to have? JC is relatively busy at times, but overall ISN'T busy. Plus, a large percentage are expats and not tourists IMO. In my warped perspective, Gay Pattaya should be flourishing.

2. Why are younger gays not coming to Pattaya?


And if you respond that the apps are killing the city, please tell me why Straight Pattaya is still doing well regardless of apps.

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Re: Why are Gay Mongers So Old?

Post by Gaybutton »

bi-top wrote:
Thu Nov 03, 2022 12:34 pm
Where are the slightly younger guys?
Despite the fact that the exchange rates are improving, they are still a far cry from what they used to be. Thailand was once considered an inexpensive holiday. Now, the airfare alone can put a damper on things. The rest of the world isn't doing so great economically these days either. Maybe younger guys just can't afford it.

Maybe younger guys don't need to travel abroad to find whatever they're looking for.

Maybe they know as well as the rest of us that the bar scene is still a shadow of its former self and there is still a very long way to go before the bar scene is attractive to them.

Quite frankly, I don't recall Thailand's gay venue scene, even during the "Golden Years" ever having attracted all that much of a younger-than-50 crowd in the first place. And I don't see the gay scene attracting all that much of an older-than-50 crowd either just yet.

I think the gay scene will recover, but will probably take a long time before it does and I doubt it will ever again be anything like the way it used to be during those "Golden Years", especially with the powers-that-be obsessed with their asinine family oriented push. I don't see that happening either. Those of us who were fortunate enough to experience Thailand's gay scene during those "Golden Years", we're the lucky ones.

If the gay scene eventually does make a significant recovery, then we'll see what age group is attracted.

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Re: Why are Gay Mongers So Old?

Post by BKKDreamer »

Hello bi-top,

This exact conversation came up in Boyztown last night while I was drinking a beer with a friend.

I am 61 and I live in Jomtien but I frequent both Boyztown in Pattaya and Supertown in Jomtien.
And you are right about the age range of what I see and observe with ONE exception, which is the Russians.
The Russians that I am seeing at the Dongtan gay beach and in Supertown appear to be in the younger age range of 30s to 50s.
So, perhaps within the Russian gay market - Pattaya is still seen as a popular place for young gays to frequent.

Prior to moving here as a retiree expat (2 months prior), my retirement options were to return to my country of birth - the USA, or to remain in Europe - most likely in Italy. I chose not to retire in either of those places because:

- economics - the cost of retirement would be prohibitively expensive for me in the USA and in Italy it would be better - but I would not be able to afford the quality of lifestyle that I can have in Thailand for the same amount of money,
- the gay scene - in both the USA and Italy, being old is almost like a curse. The younger gays just prefer that we are invisible. It is almost as if they are put off when they look at us, as if they see their older age future in us (which they fear), which triggers some kind of hostility towards us. It is hard to explain - but I have seen it play out so many times.

What I cannot figure out is where will the young gays of today (other than the above mentioned Russians) go to retire? From various social media curators I see that certain destinations are constantly being pushed, such as the Canary Islands, Spain, Greece, Florida, and certain parts of California. So, perhaps, the excitement and uniqueness of retiring in Thailand amongst our younger gay peers has lost its luster and they may view it as the boomer destination for retirement instead of whatever the younger generation calls themselves now.

However, this does not answer bi-top's excellent observation regarding the young heterosexual straight guys that I see walking around in Soi Buakhao and Walking Street in Pattaya - they are in abundance.

Perhaps there has been a fracture in retirement and vacation destinations between heterosexuals and gays ?

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Re: Why are Gay Mongers So Old?

Post by bi-top »

I decided to look up "where do gays travel to".

Of all the destinations, only TWO actually mention paid sex -- although I would bet that Rio should be on that list of available paid sex. I also thought it was interesting that many authors point out that there was "free sex" available in some of these areas. I wonder if that says something about gay travelers?

The Thai capital Bangkok has become the gay Mecca of Asia within just two decades. The city is perceived as the most open in Asia to the LGBTQ community. Bangkok has become a well-known open and tolerant homosexual city. Shops, restaurants, and gay and lesbian clubs are blooming on every street corner. This is partly due to the popularity of gay pay-sex, but a lively free scene has established as well.
https://worker69.com/best-worldwide-sex ... or-gay-men

Another comment -- do gays "share" information and tips like the hetero paid sex world does? gay forum participation has nose-dived. Straight forum participation and trip reports and tip sharing is still substantial.

I'm trying to understand what makes it so different.

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Re: Why are Gay Mongers So Old?

Post by Gaybutton »

bi-top wrote:
Thu Nov 03, 2022 3:02 pm
gay and lesbian clubs are blooming on every street corner.
Whoever wrote that, apparently someone trying to pass himself off as some sort of expert, is (to put it as kindly as I can) exaggerating. He also comes across as trying to tell us that Bangkok's gay tolerance is something new. Even before I lived in Thailand and would come for holidays, Bangkok has always been like that. I also know of no restaurant in all of Thailand that has ever turned away customers because they are gay.

You asked, "do gays "share" information and tips like the hetero paid sex world does?" Having never used it, I have no idea what the hetero paid sex world does. Gays can easily get all the information and tips they want on this board, the Gay Guides board, and the Sawatdee boards. If you can't find what you're looking for, all you have to do is ask and you're likely to get plenty of responses.

I don't see any significant decrease in board use. Many judge these boards by numbers of posts. I do not. I couldn't care less about how many posts appear here. What I do care about is the content of the posts. Quite frankly, I have about zero interest in which bars have boys with the biggest dicks types of posts. I also care about how many people I see reading the posts. That's how I judge a successful board. Large numbers of posts always seem to come periodically. We may go a few weeks with hardly any posts at all and next thing we know all of a sudden kaboom!

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Re: Why are Gay Mongers So Old?

Post by Jun »

Most gay travel websites along the lines of Worker69 are inaccurate & tend to be not particularly informative. So I don't waste much time reading them.
The Bangkok section recommends Soi Twilight and Babylon, for example.
Then for Berlin, they say "Schöneberg is particularly good for gay tourists in Berlin. This is arguably the first place in Berlin that you should visit. Another important place for gay tourists is the Motzstraße"
Well, Motzstrasse is in Schöneberg. It's almost like the author has never been there, which I think is likely to be a common theme with such websites.


So moving back onto the main topic.

1 One of the attractions of Pattaya is the money boys. However, young people should not to need to pay for sex with other young people and tend not to have the money.

2 Another attraction is the reliable weather in the winter season, so it's good for a long holiday. Fine if you are retired and don't need to go back to work.

3 I think the younger people in Europe mostly go on holidays nearer to home, with shorter cheaper flights. I suspect the same applies in North America, probably even more so, considering the distance. Now whilst Moscow is obviously in Europe, the flight time to Bangkok is about 9 hours, so that's a useful improvement, compared with flying from western Europe. So I'm not surprised Thailand is popular with Russians.

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Re: Why are Gay Mongers So Old?

Post by bi-top »

Jun wrote:
Thu Nov 03, 2022 4:17 pm
1 One of the attractions of Pattaya is the money boys. However, young people should not to need to pay for sex with other young people and tend not to have the money.
I just want to clarify that I was referring to 30-35+ age group -- which, even though they are younger, doesn't place them on the same playing field as the 18-29 yo who, yes, are having sex for free with other young people.

My reference was specifically to a younger tourist group of 30+ that has money. Any walk down Walking Street or visit to the Discos will make you realize just how large this group of travelers is --- but they are in the STRAIGHT world. (I am making a generalization based on observation and assumption. I don't see the same "groups" in BT, or JC).

Gaybutton wrote:
Thu Nov 03, 2022 3:41 pm
You asked, "do gays "share" information and tips like the hetero paid sex world does?" Having never used it, I have no idea what the hetero paid sex world does.
Let me share a few observations. Hetero forums are substantially more active with trip reports with photos, reviews of girls and "let's meet up for a drink" posts. There are also very active LINE GROUPS -- monthly for the hetero group (averaging 400 participants, which reset each 1st of the month); and one longterm group for the ladyboy social group (less than 40 participants).

I only mention those two because I do not know of ANY gay LINE GROUPS for Pattaya (or anywhere actually) that share tips, information, meet up requests and the like. We should have a boots-on-the-ground GAYBUTTON line group. :)

There are hetero and LB bar crawls, coordinated in real time through the line groups. I have never heard of that in the Gay Community.

And the other thing I have noticed, could be because I come across "wrong" to people, but when I have met guys and chatted briefly at gay bars (or gogos), I don't see the same "comradarie" of "Hey I'm headed to ZZYY bar; are you moving on soon, do you want to join me?". I get the feeling that the gay punter is more solo oriented and isn't looking for comraderie. But for me, meeting people like that has been a regular occurance in the straight bars and in the straight groups.

By the way, these are personal observations and experiences. If your experiences are different, I would love to hear more. The differences interest me which is why I am asking and learning.

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Re: Why are Gay Mongers So Old?

Post by Gaybutton »

bi-top wrote:
Thu Nov 03, 2022 6:37 pm
We should have a boots-on-the-ground GAYBUTTON line group. :)
I'll take that as a compliment, but very sorry, I'm not volunteering. Besides, the ground my boots are on hardly ever include bars anymore.

The idea might be a good one though, but someone other than me will have to do it - with use of someone else's name, ok?.

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Re: Why are Gay Mongers So Old?

Post by Jun »

bi-top wrote:
Thu Nov 03, 2022 6:37 pm
I just want to clarify that I was referring to 30-35+ age group -- which, even though they are younger, doesn't place them on the same playing field as the 18-29 yo who, yes, are having sex for free with other young people.
Even people in the 30~35+ age group stand a better chance of free sex with other young people than those in the 55~100 age range.
Even in one's 50s, non-paid sex with young people isn't entirely unknown. On my last trip to Malaysia, two out of 4 were free. I've had the odd rare success in Thailand & Cambodia too, but not in Pattaya.

bi-top wrote:
Thu Nov 03, 2022 6:37 pm
My reference was specifically to a younger tourist group of 30+ that has money. Any walk down Walking Street or visit to the Discos will make you realize just how large this group of travelers is --- but they are in the STRAIGHT world. (I am making a generalization based on observation and assumption. I don't see the same "groups" in BT, or JC).
1 Many of the tourists on walking street are, in normal times, from places like India, Russia and China. They might just be there to see walking street and are not in Pattaya for the sex. If they're from India, they're not even allowed in some of the walking street bars. I'm guessing that's because they usually want to walk in and watch, without buying a drink, just as they do in the gay bars. In which case, a ban seems far better than have them screw it up for all the other customers who play by the rules. If the gay bars follow suit, that's fine with me.

2 Gay culture is discouraged in some of these countries, so they may be less likely to visit Jomtien complex with their friends.

3 I don't see that many young westerners on walking street, or for that matter on my flights to Thailand. The percentage of single males of 40 and over is quite high.

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Re: Why are Gay Mongers So Old?

Post by bi-top »

Gaybutton wrote:
Thu Nov 03, 2022 6:45 pm
bi-top wrote:
Thu Nov 03, 2022 6:37 pm
We should have a boots-on-the-ground GAYBUTTON line group. :)
I'll take that as a compliment, but very sorry, I'm not volunteering. Besides, the ground my boots are on hardly ever include bars anymore.

The idea might be a good one though, but someone other than me will have to do it - with use of someone else's name, ok?.
Creating the group (with someone else' name) isn't the problem - setting up is a five minute project. The problem, IMO, is getting enough guys willing to (and INTERESTED) in joining a LINE group like this (*AND PARTICIPATING*). The fact that no one has done it so far and promoted it here makes me wonder if it is a DOA idea.

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