Think my boyfriend took my passwords

[Rocket]

Boyfriend might be generous. I met him in Jomtien complex back in December and he’s been living with me for the last two months.
We’ve had a great time, me with the sex,he with his pay and gifts. In addition to paying him, I bought him a new phone, and a gold necklace and bracelet. I can afford it and I’m a giving person, so no problem there.
I got lazy and trusting . I put my written down passwords on an envelope and keep it in plastic and throw it in my bureau drawer. Well I needed it for a password and it wasn’t in the plastic envelope. I’m 90% sure he must have taken it. It’s possible it blew out of the drawer but very unlikely.
I’m not neat and I have papers all over the place so maybe he thought I wouldn’t notice it.

I immediately got very hot, when I’m under stress that happens to me. I turned on the ac and thought about what to do.

Unless he’s a professional, I don’t think he can use them for much. The passwords are there but I coded which accounts they belong to. For instance Gaybutton account would have a button next to it, etc. And I left out most of the usernames. The most serious account he wouldn’t know what it’s for and even with the correct email and password you need google Authenticator.Ive changed my PIN code on my device as well.


So I’m not going to confront him yet. When he leaves to pick up a package, he gets them everyday, I’ll see if the envelope is in his belongings.

If it were me trying to take the passwords, I’d write them down, then put the envelope back in the drawer. Now I can change the passwords, at least in the most important accounts as I have them memorized.

I let my guard down also because he knows no English and can’t read it either.However he’s great at translating into English on his tic tok and Facebook accounts.


I’ve been coming here for years so I know it’s hard to believe or trust these guys motives. Of course it’s mostly money based. Just thought I’d relate an unpleasant experience and never let your guard down with someone you hardly know.

[Gaybutton]

You are now in a very awkward situation. The first thing I would check is whether there has been any unusual activity or any money missing from my bank accounts. I can't imagine why he would want your passwords for any other reason.

I would not go rummaging through his belongings before I've made damned sure I didn't somehow misplace it myself. Assuming he realizes you refer to the paper, wouldn't he have had sense enough to put it back where he found it?

If it does turn out to be him, then to me it wouldn't matter why he did it. If he did it, then he betrayed my trust and, as painful as it might be, I would immediately "finish" him and make him leave. The most I would do for him in that eventuality would be to give him enough money to rent a room for a month and eat. After that, he's on his own.

If he tries to apologize and come back, I would not permit it. Once he betrayed my trust, that's it. Gone and no way would he be coming back. I would have to reluctantly accept the loss. I could never live with someone who has shown me he can't be trusted.

I hope it turns out that it wasn't him and he had nothing to do with it. But one way or another you need to make sure.

[Jun]

I would not go rummaging through his belongings before I've made damned sure I didn't somehow misplace it myself. Assuming he realizes you refer to the paper, wouldn't he have had sense enough to put it back where he found it?

I share my home. If I can't find something, I assume it's my fault and this is one rare case where I've always been right.

If he wanted your password list, the sensible approach would be to photograph it and not take it.

My password list is on excel and is password protected. Also, for important stuff, like financials, my passwords are based on car number plates that I remember and my list just refers to the car.
For less important stuff, I confess to having the same password for multiple sites.

[Rocket]

Thanks for replies. I’ve checked my financial accounts, all fine, except one I can’t check because I don’t remember that password. They notify me if there’s any suspicious activity. I have 2f identification on almost all accounts. However my phone where they send the code to on that account I had temporarily on hold as I use ais SIM card here in Thailand. I’m going back to USA in three weeks so I can reset it then. He cannot get that code either.

I’m about 97% sure he took the envelope but I’m still double checking. I’m hoping it was just an opportunity he took advantage of but doesn’t really know what to do with the information. I’ve had a boy previously steal a credit card but he never used it, maybe scared to.

I’m being cautious as I’ve blamed boys in the past and it was me who misplaced something. But blaming the one who stole my credit card afterwards for something else, he brought that on himself.

The fact he didn’t photograph it makes me think he’s not bright enough to do more.

[Gaybutton]

I’m hoping it was just an opportunity he took advantage of but doesn’t really know what to do with the information.

If it turns out he took it, no matter what the reason might have been, it would then be a fact that he betrayed your trust and you misjudged him from the start. In my opinion, no matter how much you like him, you are going to have to end it unless you want knowing he can't be trusted to be part of your life. I hope you have better sense than to fall for "I'm sorry. I promise nothing like this will ever happen again." If he did it once, sooner or later he'll do something else. I guarantee you are not the only farang who has been through something like this. Consider yourself lucky nothing more serious happened. I've seen farang lose literally everything because of one of these boys - and I've seen it several times more than once.

However you look at it, it's a sad situation. But remember, he did it. No one forced him to do that and he brought on the consequences himself. If he really did it, he has no one to blame except himself. And now you're going to have to change every password that might have been on that paper.

Since you are going back to the USA in three weeks, now you have three weeks to make sure. If indeed it was him, that will be the perfect opportunity to bring it to an end and difficult as it may be, it will have to be done. Remember, nothing about this is your fault.

If you do have to end it, rest assured once he understands you are not going to change your mind, he'll be right out there looking for his next farang.

[Dodger]

........I’ve checked my financial accounts, all fine, except one I can’t check because I don’t remember that password.

Just ask your boyfriend...

Just kidding.

[Rocket]

If it turns out he took it, no matter what the reason might have been, it would then be a fact that he betrayed your trust and you misjudged him from the start.

Yes, you’re right, the hard truth. The really sad part is I dumped my boyfriend of 7 years for this guy. I have time to think this over. I had promised him I would pay off his student debt when I got back home. But maybe this is a blessing as I know he can’t be trusted. And next year when I come back I’ll be free of him and find someone else.

He will be on to the next supporter. He’s big on social media and has many followers. It scares me when I look at his ID card. He looks like a thug. You would never believe in a million years it’s him now. He’s very talented with makeup and is a stunning twink. He can create amazing videos of himself.

[Jun]

This theft would make very little sense.

If stealing a password list with malicious intent, the obvious thing to do would be to hack your accounts immediately.
The alternative of waiting until you go home is only sensible had he photographed the password list and left the hard copy where it was.

After searching everywhere where I might have placed it myself, I'd discretely look for conclusive proof before blaming him.

Regarding security, I briefly visited the Index mall on Sukhumvit earlier in the month. Prior to visiting the Okhaju restaurant for an excellent meal.
They have room safes from about 1800 baht & I suspect you can get better value elsewhere.

Writing your exact password down on a piece of paper is not best practice. Some kind of coded list makes more sense. Mine is based on car numberplates. For instance, if I write Golf23, that would be the number plate of my old VW Golf, followed by 23.

[Rocket]

This theft would make very little sense.

If he really wanted to hack my accounts, he’d drop me off at the airport and do it then. While traveling is a good time to hack and I’ve heard this being done. No way to call security or know if your account is being drained.

I’m still looking but no trace yet. I use my passwords frequently and I always put them next to me in the drawer, with plastic over it to protect it from dropping water on it.
I have a safe in my condo but I frequently use my list so stupidly didn’t lock it up. In a way I’m lucky because the missing envelope warned me. I now have the inconvenience of replacing all the passwords.


I think he’d have a difficult time trying to enter the username and password on any account. He won’t know which account they’re for as I’ve coded that.
Also my username is different in different accounts. The passwords are complex, except for my Uber, Social Security, eBay accounts. I use large and small letters, apostrophes, slashes and numbers similar to letters. Unless he’s lucky and puts them all in perfectly, the incorrect message will come up and he won’t know if it’s the username or password that’s wrong.

Car # plates is a great idea. My most important account I have memorized and it’s 15 digits long.

Yes, I’m dumb for not using my safe, let my guard down. I’ll be purchasing a Yubo key that must physically go into your device to get access, soon.
I’m reluctant to use the password service companies because a major one was breached recently.
Now they want to replace passwords with the passkey. It would eliminate stolen passwords and phishing attacks. Only the passcode from your device would give you access.

[Gaybutton]

I hope it turns out that you merely misplaced it or even accidentally threw it out (I've done that). I can't make any sense as to why he would steal the list. If he has any computer savvy at all, he would know simply having the passwords would do him no good. And especially if he is aware that you refer to the list, then it would be beyond absurd for him not to have put it back and avoid suspicion once he had the information he wanted.

I would think he also would know if money was stolen from your bank account and you report it to the police, the first thing they would investigate would be him.

It makes most sense to me that it will turn out you somehow misplaced it. For both your sakes, I hope that will be exactly what happened. I hope the reality is he is completely innocent.