English can be very strange . . .

[Gaybutton]

1. The bandage was wound around the wound.
2. The farm was used to produce produce.
3. The dump was so full that it had to refuse more refuse.
4. We must polish the Polish furniture.
5. He could lead if he would get the lead out.
6. The soldier decided to desert his dessert in the desert.
7. Since there is no time like the present, he thought it was time to present the present.
8. A bass was painted on the head of the bass drum.
9. When shot at, the dove dove into the bushes.
10. I did not object to the object.
11. The insurance was invalid for the invalid.
12. There was a row among the oarsmen about how to row.
13. They were too close to the door to close it.
14. The buck does funny things when the does are present.
15. A seamstress and a sewer fell down into the sewer.
16. To help with planting, the farmer taught his sow to sow.
17. The wind was too strong to wind the sail.
18. After a number of injections my jaw got number.
19. Upon seeing the tear in the painting, I shed a tear.
20. I had to subject the subject to a series of tests.
21. How can I intimate this to my most intimate friend?

Got any more . . .?

[Alex]

A dope named Lance was sent to the dope test (edited to add: after he had visited his dope dealer).

[lvdkeyes]

I read the red book until I was too tired to read anymore.

[christianpfc]

I love such stuff! I have a collection of similar word play, but I can't find it. Here two from memory:

"I'm Christian, but I'm not Christian"

and a similar one in French: "Manuel n'est pas manuel" (Manuel is not skilful).

[Gaybutton]

"Manuel n'est pas manuel" (Manuel is not skilful).

Perhaps Manuel needs a manual to guide him when he does manual labor.

After his daily labor he came home only to find his pregnant wife having labor pains.

I saw a lean man lean on a table.

A book on the table was open to its table of contents.

The horses were very stable in the stable.

I saw a dog bark at a pile of bark.

To change the flat, he had to leave his flat. Then Jack had to jack up the car. Changing the tire caused him to tire.

When I have a steak, it's rare for me to order it rare.

That jerk grabbed my arm and gave me a quite painful jerk.

I wonder if Mohammed Ali learned to box by punching a box.

When I dropped the aspirin tablet, it landed right on my tablet.

He was right to turn right. As he turned left he ate what was left.

The man had a fit when his shirt didn't fit.

He thought the boss would sack him when he saw what was in his sack.

As he left the plane he took some drugs. He got off and got off.

Someone should kick that ass in his ass . . .

[christianpfc]

"Not he who is right wins the war, he who is left wins the war" (or similar, I don't remember exactly)

[Gaybutton]

"Not he who is right wins the war, he who is left wins the war" (or similar, I don't remember exactly)

The actual quote is from Bertrand Russell: "War does not determine who is right - only who is left."

[christianpfc]

Three years ago, I bought a book at Chatuchak market "The Homonyms Finder", which includes the following poem. (Fortunately, we have internet, so I don't have to type all of it, just google the first two lines to get the whole poem from http://wordinfo.info/unit/3650)

Wood you believe that I didn't no
About homophones until too daze ago?
That day in hour class in groups of for,
We had to come up with won or more.

Mary new six; enough to pass,
But my ate homophones lead the class.
Then a thought ran threw my head,
"Urn a living from homophones," it said.

I guess I just sat and staired into space.
My hole life seamed to fall into place.
Our school's principle happened to come buy,
And asked about the look in my I.

"Sir," said I as bowled as could bee,
"My future roll I clearly sea."
"Sun," said he, "move write ahead,
Set sail on your coarse. Don't be mislead."

I herd that gnus with grate delight.
I will study homophones both day and knight.
For weaks and months, through thick oar thin,
I'll pursue my goal. Eye no aisle win.

They missed a few: two-too-to, sail-sale.

A pretty deer is dear to me,
A hare with downy hair,
A hart I love with all my heart,
But I can barely bear a bear

‘Tis plain that no one takes a plane
To get a pair of pears,
Although a rake may take a rake
To tear away the tares.

Beer often brings a bier to man,
Coughing a coffin brings,
And too much ale will make us ail,
As well as other things.

Quails do not quail before a storm,
A bough will bow before it;
We can not rein the rain at all,
No earthly power reigns o’er it.

‘Tis meet that man should mete out meat
To feed one’s sunny son;
The fair should fare on love alone,
Else one can not be won.

I would a story here commence,
But you might think it stale;
So we’ll suppose that we have reached
The tail end of our tale.

Vagely reminds me of LMTU's posts!

[Gaybutton]

Three years ago, I bought a book at Chatuchak market "The Homonyms Finder", which includes the following poem.

With that book, were you content with the rest of the content?

[lvdkeyes]

I took the advice from a guide book to book my hotel in advance.