There's no fool like an old fool

Anything and everything about gay life anywhere in the world, especially Asia, other than Thailand.
User avatar
Jogger
Posts: 196
Joined: Mon Aug 23, 2010 4:29 pm
Liked: 4 times
Been liked: 10 times

#1 There's no fool like an old fool

Postby Jogger » Sat Dec 30, 2017 9:41 am


User avatar
Gaybutton
Site Admin
Posts: 14778
Joined: Sat Jul 31, 2010 11:21 am
Location: Thailand
Liked: 1 time
Been liked: 559 times

#2 Re: There's no fool like an old fool

Postby Gaybutton » Sat Dec 30, 2017 9:59 am

Unfortunately, similar stories are all too common and frequent right here in Thailand. It almost invariably happens shortly after, and sometimes immediately after, something highly expensive has been put in the boy's name and/or the boy gets his hands on a hefty amount of the farang's cash.

I also often hear stories about a farang who died and left a huge amount of money to the Thai boy, and within a year the money is gone and the boy is right back working in the bars, looking for "new farang."

Once again I am reminded of the safest thing to do - the Richard Burk philosophy: "If you want love in Thailand, rent it."

fountainhall
Posts: 1464
Joined: Fri Jan 27, 2017 11:45 am
Location: Bangkok
Liked: 128 times
Been liked: 369 times

#3 Re: There's no fool like an old fool

Postby fountainhall » Sat Dec 30, 2017 11:01 am

What I can't get my head around is moving for the first time to a totally foreign country at that very advanced age, having no friends there and knowing nothing of the language or its customs. Clearly also its laws. Did he never once think of a will that would transfer the rights to the flat after his death? On reflection that might not have been a good idea either. He might have been led up a dark alley one evening and met his maker rather earlier than expected!

User avatar
Bob
Posts: 979
Joined: Sat Jul 31, 2010 11:03 pm
Been liked: 20 times

#4 Re: There's no fool like an old fool

Postby Bob » Sat Dec 30, 2017 11:30 am

A guy (who posted on this and other boards) who lived near me in Chiangmai and died in October of 2013 left his entire testate estate to his CM boyfriend. His US estate consisted of a one-fourth interest in two apartment buildings in Southern California and the decedent's brothers listed the value of the bf's 1/4 interest at $547,000.00 in the probate Inventory filing. In spite of being repeatedly warned not to sign anything without proper advice, the bf in short order made a deal to give up his interest in the US estate for $90,000.00. I have no doubt that the decedent's brothers, who detested the decedent's lifestyle, absolutely and intentionally undervalued the 1/4 interest and the CM bf, wanting as much money as he could get as fast as he could get it, signed off before he ever knew what the real value of his interest was (although decedent had told him years before it was worth 10 million baht and was pointedly told by me that the interest was likely worth 30 million baht or more).

And, of course, the entire $90,000 was gone within a year before the CM bf started asking around if he could request more money. The answer, of course, was and remains "no."

Too many Thai bf's are simply ignorant about how to handle money and it's a too bad that Thailand doesn't recognize the concept of a legal trust, a vehicle that could be used to have somebody with some minimal financial acumen reasonably invest the corpus and then provide funds annually to the bf that could very well last for a lifetime.

Those of us who have significant others here ought to carefully consider how estate interests are handled in light of the bf's financial acumen. Yes, some Thais can be trusted to handle significant sums wisely; however, I suspect most of the bf's wouldn't have a clue. Using a US trust vehicle is a bit awkward but would do the trick of preventing the bf (and his family and friends....many of whom have outstretched hands once they know somebody has hit the jackpot) from blowing the funds in short order but I also suspect (and know) that some falang here who do not have anyone back in their home country that they'd trust to act as a trustee (and using a bank as trustee is sometimes not all that financially prudent).

And, of course, there's the "I'm never going to die" falang who dies without a proper estate plan (even a simple will) and with a bf who has zero clue as to what the falang owned both here (other than he likely knows what Thai bank he used) let alone what the falang owned back in his home country. Too often the hardest part of a falang's death is sorting out what's where and how to get it resolved long after the falang's ashes have blown away in the wind. And, even after resolution and receipt, the funds often disappear overnight. In my view, it's our (the adult falangs') responsibility to make some effort to attempt to make sure that doesn't happen.

haim

#5 Re: There's no fool like an old fool

Postby haim » Sat Dec 30, 2017 2:48 pm

The irony of this situation is that he (probably) could buy the apartment on his own name, make (a vague) promise to his boyfriend that he can leave it to him if he behaves and live happily ever after....

User avatar
Captain Kirk
Posts: 558
Joined: Sun May 22, 2011 2:48 am
Location: Pattaya
Been liked: 32 times

#6 Re: There's no fool like an old fool

Postby Captain Kirk » Sat Dec 30, 2017 9:31 pm

One look at the Romanian guy's face in the 'wedding kiss' pic tells you everything you'd need to know about his intentions. On the other point being made regarding leaving everything to the bf once you die, I don't see anything wrong with that. If the bf has made the presumably older guy happy right to the end then why not. If the bf then blows it all within a year that is his problem.

User avatar
Gaybutton
Site Admin
Posts: 14778
Joined: Sat Jul 31, 2010 11:21 am
Location: Thailand
Liked: 1 time
Been liked: 559 times

#7 Re: There's no fool like an old fool

Postby Gaybutton » Sat Dec 30, 2017 11:15 pm

Captain Kirk wrote:regarding leaving everything to the bf once you die, I don't see anything wrong with that.

I agree. Hopefully the boy won't blow it, but as you say, that's his problem.

Sometimes I think the farang truly owes it to the boyfriend. Some of you may remember David-in-Pattaya. He was a perfect example of that. When he was dying of cancer, his boyfriend took incredibly good care of him and remained loyal to him right up to the end. David knew he was dying and easily could have provided for the boyfriend. But he left the boy absolutely nothing. Everything was left to David's brother. I don't think any of you need me to tell you how much the brother let the boy have.

fountainhall
Posts: 1464
Joined: Fri Jan 27, 2017 11:45 am
Location: Bangkok
Liked: 128 times
Been liked: 369 times

#8 Re: There's no fool like an old fool

Postby fountainhall » Sun Dec 31, 2017 11:51 am

I had not heard the tale of David before and I find it both extraordinary and very depressing. How can someone who is slowly dying not recognise the care being given by his partner? Why did he give it all to the brother? Had there been an affair between him and the brother? Even had that been the case, did not any of his friends gently prod him about how he planned to take care of his partner after death?

User avatar
Gaybutton
Site Admin
Posts: 14778
Joined: Sat Jul 31, 2010 11:21 am
Location: Thailand
Liked: 1 time
Been liked: 559 times

#9 Re: There's no fool like an old fool

Postby Gaybutton » Sun Dec 31, 2017 3:17 pm

fountainhall wrote:did not any of his friends gently prod him about how he planned to take care of his partner after death?

His brother lived in the UK. I don't know if David had a will and left everything to his brother or if he died without a will, meaning all legal claims went to his next of kin - his brother.

As for friends bringing up anything about how he planned to take care of the boyfriend, as far as I know everyone, including me, who knew him merely assumed he was going to take care of the boyfriend. Speaking only for myself, it never even occurred to me to say anything about it.

I do clearly remember we were all surprised and shocked when we found out he made no provisions for the boyfriend, especially since he knew well in advance that the cancer was terminal. That was a common topic of conversation among us for months.

I'm only using this story to point out that instead of leaving a close boyfriend nothing, based on an assumption that the boy is likely to waste the money and go though it relatively quickly, unless there is a hell of a better reason not to, then my opinion is the farang ought to leave a loyal boyfriend as substantial an amount as possible. If the boy goes through it, that's his own affair.

fountainhall
Posts: 1464
Joined: Fri Jan 27, 2017 11:45 am
Location: Bangkok
Liked: 128 times
Been liked: 369 times

#10 Re: There's no fool like an old fool

Postby fountainhall » Sun Dec 31, 2017 4:35 pm

Sorry I made a wrong assumption about the brother being the boyfriend's brother!

It certainly sounds as though he had no Thai will, in which case I understand Thai courts automatically award all Thai assets to the nearest next of kin. I am not sure when he died, but there have been several threads about this in the main chat rooms over the last half dozen years at least.


Return to “Gay World”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 20 guests